Power Rankings Headed into Week 10

Our rankings in a nutshell

1. Giants (6-2): Its hard for the opposition to score when their QB is in a body cast.  (MP3)

2. Ravens (6-2): Baltimore talks that spit and backs it up. Ray Rice almost put up 200 yards of total offense and Waka Flacco Flame is starting to get it together.  (DL)

3. Steelers (6-2): Survived a scare against the Bengals, but barely.  They got a taste of their own medicine with 3 players sustaining concussion.  They lost their starting LT Max Starks for the year, putting more pressure on Big Ben, but I heard he's crafty in tight situations.  (MP3)

4. Falcons (6-2):  The defense is there and Turner the Burner and Rowdy Roddy are making Matty Ice's job easy.  Falcons vs. Mike Vick in the playoffs?  Yes please.  (DL)

5. Jets (6-2): Sometimes, it's better to be lucky than good.  Lucky as in you barely snuck by a Staffordless Lions and Donkey Kong as their field goal kicker. (DL)

6. Patriots (6-2): Shayne Graham breaks the team's record streak of most weeks in a row starting a kicker whose last name ends in "i".  Meanwhile, Wes Welker feels robbed, only needing a few more XP attempts to gain fantasy eligibility at kicker. (MP3)

I'm gonna show you God does exist...

7. Packers (6-3):  Aaron Rodgers will spend his bye week filming the stunts for National Treasure 3. (MP3)

8. Eagles (5-3): DeSean Jackson returned from his concussion like he never left.  He probably doesn't remember that he left. (MP3)

We run that way, right?

9. Saints (6-3): Nothing too exciting or different from last week.  Just the same ol Drew Brees and his mole. (DL)

10. Colts (5-3): Jacob Tamme is on the the injury report for a sore back... interesting since he carried most of the offense on Sunday. (DL)

11. Titans (5-3): Everybody's favorite Madden team is ready to take the field fresh off a bye week.  This offense is going to treat Miami like Randy treats caterers. (MP3)

12. Chiefs (5-4): Brutal loss the the surging Raiders... wait what?  Cassel actually looked like a passer for once but the running game couldn't get going/ (DL) 

13. Buccaneers (5-3):  Josh Freeman looks like the real deal. Could have been 6-2 if Blount had knocked out at least one more opposing player before getting stopped on 4th and 1. (DL)

14. Chargers (4-5):  Don't call it a comeback... (MP3)

15. Texans (4-4): Foster... American for stud RB.  Texans... American for terrible defense. (DL)

16. Raiders (5-4): Keep on surprising folks, except me.  Do you think Washington is calling tradebacks for Campbell? (MP3)

17. Rams (4-4): Probable the only week Steven Jackson not getting the ball is justified.  Bradford is coming along...(MP3)

18. Vikings (3-5): If they take a cue from Favre and play balls out, the NFC North is in their reach.  Over Under 5 days before Childress is playing golf with Wade? (MP3/DL)

19. Bears (5-3): Don't let the record fool you, 3 of these wins came from our bottom 3 teams. (MP3)

After meeting with league officials, Anne Frank
will be relieved of her duty as a referee.

20. Dolphins (4-4): I really think we need more Channing Crowder coverage.  And the Dolphins D would appreciate any thing that resembled coverage... Win-Win. (MP3)

21. Redskins (4-4): The Donovan Mcnabb saga is going to ruin this team.  Why all the hate?  Portis may be back this week to provide a small boost. (DL)

22. Jaguars (4-4): Spent their bye wondering if Garrard can put up a repeat performance of 2 weeks ago. Their conclusion: Probably not... (MP3)

23. Seahawks (4-4): Yikes. (DL)

24. Bengals (2-6): I think we jinxed them last week with the no crime talk, because Ochocinco looks like he might kill Carson Palmer. (MP3)

25. Lions (2-6): If Donkey Kong Suh had spent more time practicing PATs instead of just the part where he destroys O-Lines and QBs, the Lions might have knocked off the Jets.  Stafford came back just in time to get hurt again, you can close the book on this season. (MP3)

Nom Nom Da Kong

26. Browns (3-5): Playing good defense and the Incredible Hulk is beasting.  McCoy won't let himself be the reason they lose, and that's always good from rookie signal callers. (MP3)

27. Cardinals (3-5): That Beanie looks more like a dunce cap... (MP3)

28. Broncos (2-6): Rumblings of a QB switch in Denver.  Tebow has risen... on the depth chart. (MP3)

29. 49ers (2-6): Reportedly spent their bye at a pants-optional pool party with Coach Singletary. (DL)

30. Bills (0-8): Its safe to consider the game in Toronto a home game.  Its just as cold and the people don't have a clue what real football is. (MP3)

31. Cowboys (1-7): No Comment. (DL)

32. Panthers (1-7): Losing your starter for the rest of the year is bad.  Having Jimmy Clausen as your backup is worse.  (DL)

Thats harsh Braah